Team Bonding...With Your Team's Parents That is...

Since I got the job at Hastings, I have been doing a lot of reading and research on how to get off on the right foot with my players. Almost everything I have come across over the past few months has not only focused on ways to build relationships with players but also with their parents. Parents play a few key roles in the success of your program, and if you can get them on board with your vision everything becomes so easy.

Here are few things parents can definitely help with:
(1) getting in contact with other parents
(2) access to the district's "basketball community"-meaning AAU, REC, and CYO programs. Keep in mind those programs are essential parts of your program because you get your future players from those groups. Also, those opportunities can provide athletes with the opportunity for player development and a chance to hear from a coach other than you.
(3) Often times, at least in my district, parents are a huge part of the Booster Club. The Boosters provide money and financial backing/support for our athletic programs in Hastings, something which is invaluable to athletics. They provide opportunities for fundraising, and definitely for funding.
(4) They spend the most time with your players, they know their in's and out's and can have insight on how their kids really tick.

Those are just a few great things about parents and what they can bring to the table. An important thing to remember when it comes to parents is that they are resources, not liabilities. I have heard from a couple of places (PGC and my graduate program) that relationships can be thought of like a bank account. Everything you do either makes deposits or withdrawls from that "relationship bank".  By considering this every time we interact with our teams, their parents, or anyone we encounter we can help ourselves build strong relationships on trust and good feelings.

Similar to your athletes, parents want their voices and concerns heard. They like to be cared about, which is a basic need for just about everyone. There are plenty of things you can do to help add "deposits" to your relationship with your team's parents. Here are a few that I am currently using:

(1) a parents meeting at the beginning of the season where we discuss goals for our season, keeping lines of communication open, fundraising opportunities, and other things that are going to happen during the upcoming season. At this meeting also ask them what their goals are for the upcoming season. Ask them to avoid looking only at the win/loss record as major goals, encourage things like: teamwork, having fun, and being competitive. One more thing to consider is that last year is in the past. At the parent's meeting I had earlier this month we did a great exercise about moving on. I had them write down things they didn't like about last season, and right before they got to share it they ripped up their paper and we threw it out. Let them know that you are truly trying to look towards the future, its the healthy thing to do!
(2) Asking them to attend fundraising events, to reiterate that with their help we can make things happen! For example at Hastings my squad will do the concession stand for a few of the varsity football games. Not only do we have the athletes there, but their parents too. Bringing together the entire Hastings Basketball community.
(3) Be flexible and accessible. Let them know that you WANT to hear what they have to say, that you like hearing from them, and that what they have to say is valuable.
(4) Keeping them in the know. Emailing them with important information is one of the best ways to keep everyone informed.
(5) Its as simple as saying "hello". Saying "hello" to someone goes a long way, especially with people you are going to be spending a few months with. Acknowledging one another is a good way to establish rapport and provides you with an opportunity for a few deposits into that bank.
(6) An individualized letter to every parent in your varsity program. Our's are going out soon, but shhh they don't know! This letter can be used as another way to reiterate important information and let the parents know that you really do value their contributions. Think of how rare actual letters are in the mail these days, this is a unique way that only takes a little bit of effort for a major gain.

Those are just a few things I do/will do with my parents (and that is only for the preseason!).
Keep in mind what we talked about before parents are a resource, not a liability. Let them know they are important and it can make a big difference on how your season goes.

over and out.
thirteen